It’s that time again to talk relationships. We’ll start with the Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ.
The Gold often deems themselves the “fixers” of all things broken. The funny (and sad) thing about it is they are not the only ones.
Folks often “lean” on them for everything from emotional support, financial assistance and everything in between.
“Lean on Me, when you’re not strong…”
No doubt about it, the Gold (Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ) is the rock of Gibraltar for the world – or so it seems.
As the Gold temperament’s formal or informal leadership position is solidified, the requests for help soon follow.
“May I ask your advice?”
“Can you tell me how to do…?”
“Are you able to pick me up on the way?”
“I didn’t take notes, may I see yours?”
They become the “go to” people in the relationship, family or work team. Their role becomes making things right and to make them work as they should.
If a family is burdened with chaos, the Gold temperament will often get to work to bring things back into the proper balance.
For example, say siblings are fighting; the Gold will deliver the emotional (and maybe physical) “smack down” to ensure everyone begins acting “right”. They are not stingy with sharp words or heavy rebuke either. Expect them to verbally challenge the parties in order to bring peace.
“Why are you acting like a fool?” might be something an angry Gold might spew out in a parental sort of way – whether they are the parent or not.
“You know better than that” might also be something that exits their lips.
Natural-born Leaders – Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ
Leadership comes easy to these folks, so they have no problem with being in this type of authority.
If not easily offered, they like “take” it and everyone usually falls into place. I often say ‘remove one letter from Gold and you’ve got “god”. They have that sort of ability to just be in charge.
This may sound controversial, but honestly, Gold’s natural ability to calm the seas of foolishness is a strength that makes their involvement treasured and highly respected in a family, team or relationships.
People who do not have this temperament thank God for those who do! Golds are steady, consistent and an important part of relationships. They bring the foundation on which everything hinges.
Also valuable is their ability to navigate past emotions and sentiments to find root problems. Once they identify it, they get to work to remedy it.
Uses Resources Wisely
The Girl Scouts’ motto must have been created by a Gold as well as their focus of using resources wisely.
Gold’s always try to avoid waste and make use of existing resources. They are representative of the three little pigs who built their house out of brick instead of useless straw or unreliable sticks. Always prepared golds are the “go to” folks because they are always ready.
Super cool, right???
Sad part: folks may lean on them because they know the Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ has saved their money and resources for a rainy day. As a kiddo, they likely rationed their Halloween candy to make it last longer.
When folks run out of loot, who do they run to? You know they run to the Gold.
This sort of constant “begging” can grow old for the Gold temperament. I’ll bet they tire of bailing everyone out of their troubles – especially for those who do not appreciate their doing so.
It’s easy to take a good thing for granted, isn’t it? This may happen with the Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ. They’re ongoing support becomes commonplace to those who frequently need it.
They sort of hate this reality, I think. If you’re Gold or (ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ), let me know if this is true. Does it bug you people always come running to you in trouble?
As I mentioned before in other posts, the research says this temperament has a concept of “right” and “wrong” behavior.
Manners and etiquette are huge for them. So, if folks continue to take and take from them without proper acknowledgement, their shooting themselves in the proverbial foot.
Ungrateful people can quickly be viewed unworthy of help by the Golds. If they feel that way, they will likely deliver a speedy “no” the next time such a person comes a calling.
“When can I expect this back?
Along the same lines, if you borrow something from them – make sure you return it when you said you would.
They cannot stand people who lie to them (regardless the excuse). Sure, they may offer grace and forgive you the first or second time, but do know they do not appreciate it (nor will they forget it).
Someone once told me over lunch, “I don’t loan money anymore; I simply give it to the person so I won’t be disappointed when they don’t repay me”. I know her to be a Gold.
For a Gold, it’s better for you not to make a promise than to do it and not deliver on it. Not only can the trust be wounded, but also the relationship can be ruined.
If you’re a Gold…
Relax your standards as it relates to others. People are always going to do people things. They will fail, forget and let you down. It’s one thing you can count on.
It’s not because they always want to do it, it’s likely because other things take priority in their own mind.
So, don’t stress or worry and most of all don’t take it personally. Unless someone is habitually abusing you, just take it all with a grain of salt and keep the most important thing the most important thing. What is that? I’m glad you asked. It’s the relationship.
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If you have a Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ in your life…
I’m so glad you’re reading this! You’re gaining insight into how the Golds in your life and how they might feel. I’m giving you the key to the castle in this post. I’m protecting you from the dragon, man!
As a result, you can be more sensitive to their need to “fix” things, their problems with excuses and their disdain for ungratefulness.
Are you a Gold (or MBTI Gold personality – ESTJ, ESFJ,ISTJ or ISFJ) or do you know a Gold? If so, what do you think about this post?
I love ya for reading! I hope you’ll share or comment!