How can I get along better people?

How can I get along better with people?

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It’s an age-old question: How can I get along better
people? It starts with your personality.

What is your True Colors Temperament?

If Myers-Briggs Type Indicator had a glorious new baby, it would be named True Colors. In my opinion, all other personality modules are step-children. True Colors is the best way to explore personality and temperament variations among different types of people. I’m certified in DISC and MBTI, but they all fade in comparison with True Colors. For one reason, most people cannot remember what their MBTI types are!

EFNB?

NPEF?

Anything you can’t apply to real life is useless, in my opinion. Colors are easier. What’s the point in knowing about personalities if it won’t help answer the question “How can I get along better with people?” Or better yet, “what are my natural strengths?” or “What jobs best suit my personality best?”

Then, there is True Colors.

True Colors Personality Assessment associates our personalities with four relatable, east-to-remember primary colors. Simple, right? Colors are a major part of our day-to-day lives and evoke emotions. For instance, people associate the color blue with calming or soothing things. We also use the same color to describe how we feel.  Have you heard someone say “I’m feeling “blue”.  That’s one way people use color.  Others are not quite as positive like saying someone has a “black” heart.  Either way, color is a part of our vernacular.

Temperament research, in general, can help us discover and act out our truest selves. We’re affirmed by it. It reminds us we are actually some version of “normal”  in how we perceive the world around us.  If pondered properly, this research also celebrates our natural “bent” without boxing us into a set of behaviors.  I think understanding our personality (and that of others) is the key starting point in how we relate to one another – regardless of age, ethnicity, etc. Great personality resources are on Psychology.Com. Click here to view!.

I was certified as a True Colors training facilitator in year 2000.  There were times the facilitator training module moved me to tears.  Those two wonderful PH.Ds (that taught the training) presented the research in a way that made it clear to me I had been socialized to think my strengths were more of weaknesses. My parents didn’t know how to manage a robust little person like me. It wasn’t their fault. They loved me and I loved them. However, I was NOT the typical child and a hellion of a teenager. So much of it was my spunky nature of my personality.

It was there I learned my innate sense of adventure is in reality a very good thing! It wasn’t worthy of punishment or the discipline I often experienced in traditional classrooms.  Also, my constant – almost incessant – need to ask questions and analyze everything was also just part of my nature.  It wasn’t my fault the school system was designed for people with another temperament.

Sad.

Years later, I’m so glad my CEO sent me to that True Colors Facilitator Training. It changed my life. Not only did I learn how can I get along better with people, I learned how to get along better with myself. I seriously changed my life.

I think it can change yours too.

I want you to have a clear picture of who you are and what you need from work, relationships and life experiences. I want you to be able to interact with people and adjust your delivery so they can get to know you better – in all your wonderful complexity.  I want you to learn that folks don’t wake up in the morning trying to get on your nerves; they just may need different handling based on their temperament.

Most importantly, I want you to value the little people in your lives and nurture their emerging personalities and temperaments. So, they won’t spend their teen years thinking they are misfits  (like I did) because they learn and interact with others differently.

Ready to hear a little about True Colors? Great!  Here we go!

HOLD UP!

Hey! First, know your a combo of all four of these colors, but two are your primary colors. You use those to navigate the world and play the others sort of like poker chip, as needed.

How can I get along better with people?

The Green Temperament

People who score highest in the Green temperament tend to be driven by logic and analysis.   They choose problem-solving over fun any day of the week. In fact, they may often confuse the one for the other. Their strongest values are diagnosing problems and finding cutting-edge, innovative solutions.

Don’t assume these logicians are anti-relational. Greens enjoy being around people, but may have to take them in small doses. They are likely most fulfilled when they are alone: thinking, processing, and learning.  Each is difficult to do among loud or chatty people. In fact, those people likely drain their energy a bit. Quite of a few Greens are introverts and process the world internally – but not all. There are many extroverts with this temperament as well.

On the other hand, they LOVE being around folks who offer intellectual challenge or cognitive exchange. I once met a Green who said something along the lines of:  “I’m labeled anti-social, but I like being around people. I see them as puzzles solved or mysteries to be experienced. Once I know what they need, I can try to be of service and help them figure things out.”  I thought that was very sweet.

How to Get Along With People – Green people? Remember,  they love deciphering the mysteries of humanity. They try to understand what makes people tick. Allow them to ask their questions, make their many diagnosis and don’t become impatient or offended.

Want to compliment a Green? Say things like “Wow!  I never thought of that before” or “You’re very intelligent”.

How can I get along better with people?The Gold Temperament

Golds are the organizers of the world.  I don’t mean protesters in the streets although they might be among them and they are probably the reason people knew exactly where to go protest in the first place.

This temperament believes in order. They bring structure where chaos resides. Part of their life mission is to organize everything so people can do their absolute best work or live their best lives.  They love being around people because they want to help and serve them. Golds tend to enjoy working in group settings.

I have the perfect example: my beautiful mom.  She is a strong Gold.  She’s always trying to get over my house to re-arrange my cupboards, change my bedding or empty my dishwasher. For years, I thought she was doing so because she thought I was a slacker.  Then, I discovered True Colors research and that she was in fact a strong Gold!

Now, I understand she does all those things because she’s operating in her strength…her inclination.  As a result, I let her come over anytime she wants so I can do the things I most enjoy doing – thinking, writing and processing.  We both are happy and operating in our strengths. No conflict, no tension and no assumptions. The biggest complement I can give is to praise her for the help and her amazing ability to bring order. Check out the Gold profile here.

Want a good relationship with someone of the Gold personality? Remember they may come off bossy at times, but it’s usually generated from a good place. It’s their inner need to be useful and serve. Now, some people are mean. I’m not talking about those people.  That’s another post altogether.

How can I get along better people?About the Blue Temperament

Blue people make the world go around. They are the hearts of society.   Think of Ghandi or Oprah. Blues have big hearts and a burning passion for everyone to be treated fairly and respectfully. They are our advocates.

These people come out the womb naturally caring and compassionate. Blues are the kids on the playground making sure everyone is playing and everyone is OK. They are the babies giving lots of hugs and kisses.

But, they are not pushovers. No way.

The Blue Temperament has an uncanny – almost spooky -sense of intuition. They can somehow read body language and underlying statements to spot a phony or fake person in the blink of an eye. This is why they want to be around people as authentic and real as they are. They value honesty and empathy . The term “mean people suck” was likely coined by a person with the Blue temperament.

Blues filter the world through their emotions and their ability to connect with others. Inspiring, motivating and coaching is super easy for them. They enjoy being praised for their abilities to do so. They give so much of themselves at work and in relationships that they can fall into melancholy.

If you care for a Blue person, be careful to not drain them.  They need as much emotional support from you as they give out.  Allow them the freedom to withdraw when they need to and the space to share their truest feelings.  If they want to cry, let them cry.  If they want to scream in anger; let them do so. These expressive beings are at their best when they are able to let it all out without fear of judgement. Want to know how to get along better with people of the Blue personality?  Listen, encourage, allow them to care about you and many other things that lay on their heart. No judgement.

How can I get along better people?Get ready for the Adventurous Orange Temperament

If you are around an Orange personality, you know it.  These are the people that value quick action, fast-paced processes and demonstrative individuality. Conforming to the norms of life are not for them at all.  Their white-heat energy causes them to stand out from the crowd.  If excitement doesn’t find them, they manufacture it.

The consistency other temperaments need only serves to bug the fiery Orange temperament. Too much planning is for the birds in their summation. They are solutions-driven.  Oranges love the freedom to do what they want when they want to do it. They will step over systems and slow pokes to get things done! They’re not mean or trying to cause any problems.  They do it for sake of progression and excitement.  Sure, planning has it’s place in the mind of the Orange personality, but they’ll never allow it to stagnate them. They know how to be nimble and go with the flows of life.  When there is a fork in the road, they take it.

Nike isn’t the only ones who believe “Just Do It” is a way of life!

Did you see the movie “Monster-in-Law” with Jennifer Lopez? Jennifer’s character said something like “Life is too short to live the same day twice”. That’s a totally orange way of thinking. If I had to guess, I’d say Lopez’s character in the movie was a Blue Orange.  In real life, I’d bet she’s a Orange and maybe a Gold second.

Anyhoo, ready to know how to get allow with people who shine brightly Orange? You gotta let them be sensational, impulsive and take the risks most people are afraid to take.  The end result is fun, excitement and living every day as an exploration. These go-getters love feeling productive and like they are making progress.

Ok. No one color is better than another. We are just different and the same. Different because we are made differently, alike because we all have the composition. We are a spectrum of all four.

Want more information so you can further explore the question: “How can I get along better with people?”

Check out Mary Miscisin’s video. She wrote the first “True Colors” book I ever purchased, “Showing Your True Colors”. Her website is: https://positivelymary.com/.

 

So, those are all four True Colors temperaments. What do you think you might be? What other colors are in your life?

 

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13 comments

  1. I’d say I’m blue and orange just from the descriptions. This reminds me a lot of the five love languages quiz results! You should check it out and share your results! 😊

  2. This is really interesting. I have no idea which one I’d be. They all are a little of me yet none of them stand out as a yes, that’s me. I liked this though.

  3. Sometimes I wonder if we stunt folks from changing when we talk about types? People rarely change, but I’d never want to discourage it. What do you think?

    1. I’ve thought about that too. However, the best bodies of research assert that this is just a tool for understanding ourselves and the tendencies of others. But we are far too complex to fit into any “boxes” of research. I really drive that home in my workshops. I’ll make sure I express it more on this blog too. Great thought! Thanks for sharing it.

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